So, for my TMI Thursday post I have a post about poop.

I have this friend. With all of his bowel issues, he should take stock in Immodium. And he’s gay. Not that it matters, just thought I would share.

So check it, he’s out on a date with his latest boy toy. They do dinner, they have drinks, they decided to hit up a club, but first,  they take a nice long walk on the beach.

Waves crashing onto the shore, moonlight, the best kind of mood lighting there is. Hand holding. Cramps…WTF!!??!!?

And so it begins.

You know what I’m talking about. That “oh, dear” moment when know that you have to find a fuckingbathroomquick.

The boy toy decides to take the long route on the beach, of course. Friend is really starting to panic, looking around in desparation for a bathroom, anywhere. None to be found. He knows it’s coming…there’s no way to avoid it, no matter how hard he tries or clenches.

He does what any person in his situation would do (well, I certainly wouldn’t, but that’s just me.)

He shits his pants.

And then “pretends” to fall in a puddle that has miraculously formed on the beach, to, um, cover his evidence.

The date ended pretty quickly after that. I should hope so…..hand holding, moonlight and shitty pants. Not my idea of a rocking time!