I used to live with this dick guy. Every morning when the alarm would go off, I would say something to the effect of “aw, fuck, it’s way too early. I don’t wanna get up yet.” Every morning he would lecture me on how cursing first thing when you get up is not good, it ruined his day, changed the whole tone of the day, blah, blah, blah.
Thankyouvery much Tony freakin Robbins.
This week I have woken up to two emails that made me want to curse like a truck driver. Which I do anywhos, so it’s not really out of the norm, but they really ticked me off.
I had my crackberry charging near my bed and saw it as soon as my alarm went off. So not only was my alarm annoying the crap out of me, I got to see this little gem before I even had one foot on the floor. (Note to self, do not charge crackberry in bedroom. That is my space and it’s all about me in there!) It was from an employee, who emailed my boss and copied me on it basically saying that I didn’t know what I was doing, didn’t do what I promised them I would do and they needed upper management to step in. I stormed into work, explained the situation to my boss and all was right with the world. However, this particular employee continued to surface with the same complaint all fucking week. Over and over the emails would go back and forth to my boss and to another outside vendor that we use.
The next irate email that I received was actually just this morning and it wasn’t work related. Every morning I get up and check all, yes I said all…don’t judge, my email accounts. I have a separate one for my Match/eHarmony personals and one for my Yahoo personals. I don’t subscribe to Yahoo personals, but I do have a profile up there. Some loser dude emailed me there on 10/1 with some highly witty message like “Hi, can we talk?” So enticing, right? Anywho, I can’t really respond to these messages because I don’t pay for a membership, so I can choose from a bunch of stock phrases that are in a drop down box. If they are somewhat interesting, I might choose one to respond with. But when the first like of their profile is something like “Hi my name is suchandsuch and I live with my dog ruru. Ruru is a good dog, except that she’s furry,” and I don’t find their pictures even somewhat appealing, 9 times out of 10, I’m just gonna move it right along. Now keep in mind, I don’t check the Yahoo personals all that much.
So, at 11:04pm on 10/1 I get another email from the guy who loves his furry dog. (this email came about 8 hours from when he sent the original one, mind you (I didn’t even have a chance to respond with one of the stock answers like thanks but no thanks.) This is what he wrote:
what the fu ck do you mean , are all the good men gone, of course have gone, and you are not in their ranks, and you know why, couse you are not one. dont be a dumb bitch, the ratios of man to women are roughly one to one,so you will find one , to your worth and should not look for better, get it. bye now and don’t respond
What the fuck? Don’t be a dumb bitch. I am not in their ranks? And by “their” who’s ranks do you mean? All the good ones? I can tell you my friend, you are definitely not one of the good ones.
This email actually insulted me a bit, I’m not gonna lie. I don’t like to be called a dumb bitch, cause I am neither. Well, ok, I can be a bitch sometimes, but dumb I absolutely am not.
Why do people have to be so mean? I would have never, in a million years, ever responded to someone in this way. I would have politely declined his offer to chat and moved on. Did he really think he was going to win over my heart by A. not even giving me enough time to respond or B. calling me a dumb bitch or C. saying I’m not in the ranks of any good men? And maybe I’m not.
Maybe all the good ones are taken? Maybe I’m not what a good man is looking for? Maybe I set myself up to be that way?
Nah, I don’t think so. I’m awesome.
But I do know one thing, never curse as soon as you wake up. You can come up with way more colorful phrases, curse words and feel way better about doing so after you’ve had at least one cup of coffee.
Trust me , I know. Thank you very much creepy fucktard!
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
Awww, that’s really mean! Sending good thoughts your way!
xoxo
Thanks, I thought it was really mean. It actually hurt my feelings. I shouldn’t let it, but it did!
I think a lot of those guys have substance abuse issues, truly. I remember some who would just turn into FREAKS after working hours. Bizarre e-mails and whatnot…when they came across so..normal? during the day.
I like the way you think…I’ll blame it on substance abuse! lol! I certainly hope so, some of these guys are completely whack!
Definitely don’t take it personally. He sent it before you even had time to respond, so how could it remotely have anything to do with you? He doesn’t even know you, except from your profile. What he saw he liked. Then he got mad and lashed out, trying to hurt you. Nothing about you changed, only him getting mad changed.
But, um, as far as your ex, was it lecturing or was it him telling you how you made him feel? If positions were reversed and you asked your partner to keep his morning rants to himself instead of saying them out loud, wouldn’t you be kinda ticked that he couldn’t do that for you? That him wanting to cuss out loud was more important than not ruining your day? I’m not saying he wasn’t a dick in general, but on this one thing, he might have had a point.
I get your point, but it wasn’t a rant or anything like that. I probably just said, fuck it’s time to get up already. But I definitely see where you’re going with that, point taken!
People really need to find better things to do with their lives than send nasty emails. I mean, really. There has to be an episode of “Judge Judy” or “Law & Order” on that can take their minds off of being such jerks.
Right? Although, I’m guess these people should really be watching Dr. Phil or Jerry Spring..I’m just sayin’.